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Where do I even begin in moving out?

PostPosted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 8:03 am
by Medli
20, stuck at home, no job, dunno where to even start. I have a permit, but not a full liscense, but I don't really have anyyone to practice with, and I live in a rural area so nothing's in walking distance. I have several qualms with college and I'm really not looking towards, just dunno where or how to start so I can be making efforts towards something.

Re: Where do I even begin in moving out?

PostPosted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 9:01 am
by CuteButLooksPregnant
Job wise, something, anything is better than nothing. Can you walk to a WallMart or a fast food place ? A part-time minimum wage job at WallMart, McDonalds, Home Depot ( they are trans*friendly ), Target
( they are also trans*friendly ), Taco Hell (or is it Belch or Bell, I forget?), and the like is better than nothing. If you can work on getting a commercial license, then driving trucks is not get-rich-quick, but it will get you out and about. Can you walk to someone's home or business and do cleaning. Cleaning toilets is something that needs to be done, but nobody wants to do it. Could you start your own cleaning business with a few simple brushes, paper towels, and cleaning supplies ?

Re: Where do I even begin in moving out?

PostPosted: Sat Sep 09, 2017 12:47 pm
by Shizuku
Perhaps you can work on getting your full license (and the awesome freedom that will come with it), then apply for a job that needs drivers like Uber. They're always hiring. So are low-level jobs with intense physical labor (e.g. moving and packing, stock clerk, maintenance technician, groundskeeper, etc.). Basically the only requirement is passing a drug test. Security jobs also hire a lot of people as well, and they're generally easier to do than the former. If you want to make extra money on the side every few months, join focus groups.

Instead of rushing to get out of your house, I suggest putting yourself in a position to live comfortably by saving whatever money you can when you start earning it, as long as possible; it'll make transitioning easier in the longrun. If you already haven't, try to finish school. Take it one step at a time. Financial aid for attending is one way to earn money in and of itself, and you'll get a degree once it's all said and done. Always use any and every resource available to you. The best advice that I can give is to plan carefully, be patient, and be persistent... be very persistent. Improving yourself - even as you are right now - is apart of the whole transitioning process. Get motivated. Keep at it.

It'll probably be a while from now, but you can start looking into affordable housing in your area.

Re: Where do I even begin in moving out?

PostPosted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 2:01 am
by Lechin
Could try for jobs online. Plenty of opportunities. Just need to know where to look on google. There are jobs like, answering the phone, working for a hotline, web design, photography, selling written works, translating languages for people, etc.

Re: Where do I even begin in moving out?

PostPosted: Sun Sep 10, 2017 11:16 pm
by Medli
I'm out in the country, there's not really anywhere I can walk to, and I won't really be able to work more towards getting a full license til my father's next up.

I understand staying and saving up, but I just really don't like how things are now.

From what I gather, most solely online jobs are mainly for chump change, but if you have specific suggestions, I'll listen.

Re: Where do I even begin in moving out?

PostPosted: Mon Sep 11, 2017 9:32 pm
by Shizuku
Since you're in a very rural sounding area, is it possible to look for agricultural work?

I understand your sense of urgency (and around your age, I was in a somewhat similar situation as you), but things can be a lot worse if you aren't financially stable. Right now, at the very least you have a place to stay, and chances are that you don't have to pay much (if any) rent. If your life isn't in any immediate danger by living there, you can benefit from your situation by saving money when you start earning it. I mean, moving out (and transitioning) isn't exactly cheap. I hope that makes sense. :oops:

Anyway, I wish you the best of luck on your job search, amiga. Even now, you're working toward something (by asking where to start), which is a good thing.

Re: Where do I even begin in moving out?

PostPosted: Tue Sep 12, 2017 2:41 am
by Kaylalovescupcakes
I might not be able to offer much advice, but at least know you're not alone. I'm in the same boat you are: 22, rural area, no job, living at home still. The future is scary. We're at the point in our lives when we realize we're staring down the next 50-60 years of work and responsibility and honestly I have a really hard time coping with the anxiety it causes. I imagine you're feeling similar. I make a little money doing tech repairs now and then, maybe you could try something like that? I just find busted up laptops and phones and things like that, fix them for the cost of parts, and then flip them. It's nothing to make a living off, but hey, it's money to take to the bar, right?

Re: Where do I even begin in moving out?

PostPosted: Wed Sep 13, 2017 6:11 am
by a-frankly
I've heard of a few friends making a little bit doing online transcription work. It'll at least make you a good typist.

Any decent public transport? I don't care for it personally but bussing to somewhere theres work might be the only thing.

Right now I've been doing weed clearing(Weed whacking, raking, breaking down and stuff), it is in no way glamorous but its been better then nothing.

Is there any field your interested in? Passion can break through barriers.

Regardless my heart goes out to you dear good luck.

Re: Where do I even begin in moving out?

PostPosted: Wed Sep 13, 2017 7:09 am
by Medli
@Shizuku As for something agricultural, I mean, there is a berry field pretty close by, but it's not the season for work there. I'm not aware of anything else nearby though, most of the "farms" are Christmas tree farms and they're pretty low maintenance.

And yeah, I am certainly grateful there isn't a sense of urgency and I do have a home and food for free. Just a lot of arguments, and can't really transition while here, and it'd be nice to go places and all that really make me want to get out. I get the point though.

I suppose that's a way to think about it...

@Kaylalovescupcakes I really don't want to spend the next 40 years of my life working. I want all work I do, to go towards figuring out how to not have to work for the rest of my life. At the least, I could feel like I'm working towards a definable goal rather than just working to exist another day.
And I don't know nearly enough about that stuff to be able to do that, but I'm glad you have that. And yeah, Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy is amazing.

@a-frankly I had that reccommended to me by a friend. I mean, like if I need a little bit of extra money for a specifc thing that could be helpful. So I might still try it, just hard to justify the time spent with the predicted earnings.

I think there is a bus stop nearby... Dunno its schedhule but it might potentially be an option. Not a particularly desirable option for the potential time sink, fairs, and limiting of schedhule, but an option.

The other day I was doing yardwork and all that, nothing paid, but yeah.

I dunno what I'd be passionate enough about that I'd want as a job and can pursue in the short term.

And thank you everyone, didn't expect this to get so many replies, I really appreciate the input and concern and I'm sorry I'm being difficult.

Re: Where do I even begin in moving out?

PostPosted: Wed Sep 13, 2017 7:34 am
by marie
Where's the nearest big city? Go there, explore the options, get a job, find a place to stay. Millions of people have done just that. The job doesn't have to be much, just get a start.

Here in Ireland people don't just head for the cities, there is famously a long standing tradition of emigration to the USA, Canada, Britain, Australia. Often without a job to go to. It's only in recent years that Gay and Trans people didn't automatically head to Britain to find a more accepting society. Many came from dismal towns and villages, both small in mind and size. They got out.

You don't have to rush off without doing some research. Not these days but many people I know simply went. Slept on a friends sofa for a bit. Half my family at one stage simply upped and emigrated to other countries sometimes illegally. They all made a success of it in the end.

It's not easy but sometimes it's the only way. It seems you have the whole of the USA to choose from, many would envy you that.

Don't let your fears hold you back. Your only regrets in life are for the things you never did, not the things you tried and failed.

Re: Where do I even begin in moving out?

PostPosted: Wed Sep 13, 2017 8:20 am
by Medli
i dont think i can afford 1600 a month portland rent

Like, I get what you're saying, but I seriously don't have a place to just start. That's what this whole thing was about.

Re: Where do I even begin in moving out?

PostPosted: Wed Sep 13, 2017 10:23 am
by marie
$1600? Let's see, a quick google reveals you can get some nice apartments in Portland for that kind of money. No need to set your sights so high.

Anyway I'm not here to advise on accommodation or give career advice. We can all invent reasons for not doing anything. If you do that you'll never move out and never achieve your goals. The point is that there's always a way. I would suggest a visit to Portland or wherever. Go for a weekend. Check out the LGBT scene. Get a feel for the place. You might meet others like you. There might be a support group for TG people or just a gay bar. They will know the scene and might be able to point you in the right direction. It's possible you'll have the offer of a job and a place to stay before you know it.

You might think that's unlikely but many is the Irishman or woman who arrived off the plane in New York with a few dollars in their pocket who made their way to an Irish bar and left with a job and a place to stay. Happens all the time. I'm sure it's the same with Italians or any other group. Anyway the point is that you've nothing to lose by trying, indeed in your case you can simply get back on the bus and go home.

There's always a way and while it's a cliché that America is the land of opportunity, it is that and more. Ask all the illegals trying to get in every day.

I know it's tough and I was in the same boat when I was younger and the only thing I regret is that I didn't make more of an effort at the time. I actually walked away from an opportunity. I met with some crossdressers in the city who introduced to a gay bar and a trans woman. The door was open for me but I walked away. Who knows how things might have turned out if I had more nerve.

Go for it.

Re: Where do I even begin in moving out?

PostPosted: Fri Sep 15, 2017 1:48 am
by Medli
I really appreciate the speech and all, but again. I can't get a place because I don't have any money, it's difficult get money because I don't have a liscense, and it's difficult to have a liscenese because I'm stuck at home and neither or my mother are really keen on me pracitcing driving with her. I've gotten a bit of pracitce with my father but not much at all. So, like, I think you're skipping a few steps, like I'm not in a situation where I am capable of just doing something.